Finally, a creation to stand proudly alongside my jolly, delicious
Popeye spinach bread! Handmaking instructions follow, or toss in the
machine on White without a single other change. Enjoy, enjoy, enjoy!
Bugs' Bread
1/2 c. water
2c. bread flour
1 T nonfat milk solids (dry milk to you, prole)
1 T brown sugar
1 t salt
1 1/2 t. yeast
1 T melted butter
1 t dill weed
4-5 medium carrots, peeled
Preparing the carrots:
Peel and wash the carrots. Coarsely grate 2 1/2 (about 2/3c.) and
set aside. Chop 1/2 into thin slices. Add 1/2 to the water in a blender and
puree. Eat 1 for inspiration.
Mixing:
Add the yeast to the water and stir. Mix together the other dry
ingredients, including the remaining carrots, holding back a cup of flour.
Add the liquid and stir well, adding flour as needed until kneadable, and
then knead until smooth and soft with the help of further flour. If you
chopped the carrots too coarsely, they may begin popping out as you knead
and have to be removed. This is hardly a tragedy, though, as you will find
that even the dough is delicious.
Rising:
Place dough in a lightly-oiled bowl, cover, and set aside to rise
for about an hour. When doubled, punch down and place in a loaf pan (This
recipe won't fill many pans, but it can be scaled up to 1.5# simply by
multiplying all ingredients by 1.5. You may have to go easy on the
carrots), with buttered or oiled sides and oatmeal-dusted bottom (this is
my own invention. It seems to prevent sticking like nothing else I've ever
tried, and unlike the icky flour that adheres to the bottom of some things,
the oats are baked crisp and find the lower bound of their taste at
neutral.), and again cover to rise until doubled. Bake in a 350F-degree
oven for about 50 minutes, possibly longer if you like your bread dry
rather than moist. Allow to cool ~10 min.
Amusement while baking:
Tell people you're making carrot bread and explode when they reveal
they're expecting a pound cake. Tell them the bread has "weed" in it and
watch them get a psychosomatic marijuana high. Or don't say anything at
all, and when you slice into the loaf shout, "Damn phytoplankton got into
the flour again."
Counterindications:
If you eat more than one or two loaves, you may have to reassure
your doctor that you don't have hepatitis. On the bright side, carotinemia
is completely unrelated to anemic iron deficiency, and is in fact
completely benign. Discontinue use if you die -- you've had your chance.
Obsessive-Compulsive caloric information / 1/8 loaf (a MASSIVE slice, maybe 2):
Kilocalories: 144
Fat Kcal: 13
Nutrients: 0-100% DV vitamin C (still seeking info on decomposition/oxidation)
Among others
Best of luck.
mMichael
enkidu@mail.utexas.edu
**************************************************************************
"I swear to you, then," said MacIan. . . "I swear it by
the god you have denied, by the Blessed Lady you have blasphemed;
I swear it by the seven swords in her heart. I swear it by the
Holy Island where my fathers are, by the honour of my mother, by
the secret of my people, and by the chalice of the Blood of God."
The Atheist drew up his head. "And I," he said, "give my word."
_The Ball and the Cross_, G.K. Chesterton